Nila’s Mystic School Transformation Through Tantra
(4 Day Residential Event in Nepal from 19th to 22nd of June)
Introduction 🙏
On the 19th of June, we, an aspiring group of Tantra students, set out on a journey that
was not too far from home for some, but a profound search, nonetheless. In the capital
of Nepal, Kathmandu, up on Shivpuri hill, we began our search under the guidance and
light of our Gurudevi Nila 1 whom we fondly call Nila Amma. Enthusiastic to receive Nila
Amma’s wisdom, we participated in a four-day residential event with Nila’s Mystic
School, with the aim of ‘Transforming Through Tantra’.2 All throughout the retreat, with
Her blessings and protection, Nila Amma taught us to explore new realms of self and
healing through connecting with the five elements and nature around us. We learnt and
undertook various practices such as tree hugging, water cleansing, fire evoking,
breathwork and meditation. Each of these experiences, their purpose and eOects shall
be described subsequently, with the aim of illuminating the purpose of the event and
our exalted, guided, journey towards it.
1 ‘From Sanskrit, guru means “teacher” or “imparter of knowledge,” while deva (or devi) comes from the
root word, div, which can mean “light,” “luminous” or “glowing.” Therefore, Gurudeva (or Gurudevi) may be
translated to mean “luminous guru,” “guru as God” or “of God as guru.” It is said that this refers to the self-
luminous form of the master, which shines with its inner subtle light from a place beyond the physical
body’, definition provided by Sri Paramahansa Yogananda in ‘Autobiography of a Yogi’
2 ‘Transforming Through Tantra: a Tantra program regularly held for students of all levels by Nila’s Mystic School
2 ‘Transforming Through Tantra: a Tantra program regularly held for students of all levels by Nila’s Mystic School
Day 1 🌙
On the first day all of us gathered in Kathmandu and set out for Shivpuri hill, where
rested our hilltop destination. Nila Amma had arrived a day earlier and had delivered a
profound interview, broadcasted on Nepal’s national television hosted by the revered
host Tikaram Yatri, on how Nepal is intrinsically connected to Tantra, and is even known
as a ‘Tantra Bhoomi’ (Land of Tantra). This interview beautifully reflects Nila Amma’s
approach to Tantra and the reason to why she chose to have this retreat in Nepal; the
link to the interview can be found here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryLrBtaNF4k. A winding ride later, we arrived at
Prakriti Resort and Organic Farm, where we were graciously welcomed, and we settled
into the beautiful environment. Up on the lush hill covered in flora and fauna, we had a
distant view of snow-topped mountains on one end, and wide cityscape of Kathmandu
on another. We settled into our cottages and made our way to dinner where we were
welcomed with an array of local delicacies.
After feasting on delectable cheesecakes, we gathered in the meditation hall, all seated
around Nila Amma, ever enthusiastic to listen to her wise words. She navigated us
through the intentions of the coming days, and how we are to connect with the five
elements: Mother Earth, Fire, Water, Wind and Ether. Through this process, we are to
learn to let go of and surrender all energies that are done, such as exaggerated
emotions and such plights, and subsequently invoke balance and shakti 3 within the self
3 ‘Shakti’, in Sanskrit is the ‘feminine power’, ‘force of nature’ or ‘energy’. Shakti is the personification of the
primordial feminine energy’
in order to maintain this cleansed state and continue to empower ourselves. She was
well aware of our arduous travel and so she guided us through a short yet eOective
meditation that ignited our healing journey. We sat cross-legged and closed our eyes
and soon arrived at a profound state where dwelled fewer thoughts. Now we began to
feel the eOects of Nepal’s mystical grounds as our energies smoothly raised. Nila
Amma’s voice steered us from the Manipura Chakra where we felt a connect to the
Universe, to the Heart Chakra where we met our eternal internal flame over-flowing with
self-love, till the Crown Chakra wherein we blessed ourselves and created a protection
for our new-found energies. Nila Amma showered us with protection and flowers as
blessings, and later asked us to keep these flowers under our pillows that night. We
thanked our Gurudevi and all the Divine energies present there and made our way back
to our rooms to prepare for the next day.
Day 2 🌙
Most of us had undergone healing while asleep and so the following morning some
arose with interesting dream state experiences that marked this healing. Following a
hearty breakfast, we enthusiastically gathered in the meditation hall. Today, Nila Amma
explained, we were to learn of diOerent grounding techniques. She taught us various
poses and breathing techniques that would root us and connect us to Mother Earth.
After this rooted grounding, we began preparing for the water cleansing ceremony. Nila
Amma had arranged a bucket filled with water and marigold petals, another containing
milk, and Kumkum powder as she called each individual forward to approach her for the
cleanse. As the individual stood before her, she showered them with the water and milk
as she conferred blessings and chants. A prominent gasp escaped the body as soon as
the first water touched, as though something was immediately released from within. A
deep contemplation settled in after, as one felt more in tune with the ground beneath
and the skies above. After, we rushed to our rooms before the cold could seep down our
wet spines and rested for some time with warm cups of tea and snacks. The heart now
felt much lighter and the head almost empty. Now, the next event on the list for this
spirited day was to take place in the most splendid environment: we were to perform a
fire evoking ceremony. As we all gathered in a circle on a hilltop overlooking the valley,
the sky was painted by the setting sun reflecting light on rain-pregnant clouds, and right
before us, a vibrant gibbous moon just a day away from full. Awestruck, we were taken
by this ethereal beauty, it signified to us a Divine Blessing from the Elements. And so, we
commenced our powerful ritual.
The fire ignited from within a heap of firewood and oils and grew magnificently as the
strong winds pushed and molded it. As we stood looking upon this flame, a shakti
awakened within. And so, we closed our eyes and joined our palms, and we travelled
deep inwards as we naturally evoked a fierce and magnanimous energy. We stood with
our feet deeply rooted in the earth, an uncomfortable silence set in slowly as all fears
were being released and we began to surrender to this energy. Taken at first by this
powerful surrounding, our shakti and internal flame began expanding as the wind
directed it upwards and developed of match. We oOered prayers for our ancestors and
their well-being and thanked the fire and all those present, as we opened our eyes. We
did not speak much right after this experience, with all undergoing diOerent eOects,
some felt elation, some felt introspection, and some felt a burden disappeared from
them. After dinner, we gathered again, this time we were overflowing with questions, to
each Nila Amma had an answer, as she always does. We sat for one last meditation and
completed our final assignment of the day: we prepared an emotion list wherein we
wrote of all the emotions that dictated our lives and of any emotional disbalance.
Day 3 🌙
We arose early the next morning, fresh and empowered as ever, and set out on a trek
around the organic farm and towards a nearby dam, with petrichor smell still afresh
after last night’s downpour. Then, we sat down in the meditation hall and our profound
discussions began as Amma imparted with her wisdom and our curious minds soaked it
all in. On this day, we were to meditate till one in the morning as it was a beautiful
cleansing June full moon. We discussed the uplifting of life energy to the heart center
and its purpose, recipes for opening higher gateways and many such interesting and
essential topics. Following this, based on our talks, we were guided to connect with
Nature, and we set out to each find a beautiful tall tree each. Now we were to exercise
the practice of tree-hugging, through which, over time, one may no longer experience a
diOerence between self and nature. We first took the blessings of the tree we each
stood before and asked if we could embrace it. Then, we wrapped our arms tight around
our trees and pressed our face against it as we engaged all our senses in experiencing
the sounds and movements of the trees. There was deep love that generated within, a
love just like that felt when embracing a child. This love was for the tree, the moss that
covered it and all the wonderful creatures that thrived on it. After biding goodbye to our
newfound friends, we returned to the meditation hall to complete our discussions and
morning meditation. Amma asked us all to journal a desire list to manifest wherein we
would write what all we most aspire for; after all every human has desires no matter
how noble it may be.
Later that afternoon, we would have another fire-evoking ceremony, that would be
magnified by the presence of the full moon. This time, we were to oOer our emotions
lists to the fire and surrender them. And so, we gathered once more on the beautiful
grounds, yet again graced with the presence of all the elements across the cloudy sky.
The sun, however, was nowhere to be seen as a ceiling of rainclouds engulfed the sky.
Nila Amma directed us through an exercise that connected the sky and earth with us as
medium, alas the sun was out and shinning! We repeated this exercise time and again
to test its validity and not once were we let down. Now there was no doubt about the
magnitude and strength of our collective energy. We then started the fire and stood
before it in deep meditation as we began surrendering internal turmoil and tumultuous
emotions. One-by-one, we oOered our emotions lists to the fire and said our individual
prayers to the fire, engaging a profound conversation between one and the fire. A
penetrative healing took place, so powerful that we all returned to the hall and sat in
meditation for the Mother Earth to ground and recollect our energies. A calm spread, as
many emotions were purged into the fire, this calm has had a long-term eOect, as
though every word in our letters were read and answered by the fire. With the full moon
at its prime from 11:45 pm to 12:15pm, we meditated for an hour, connecting with her
healing love, and receiving all her abundant blessings. After this, Amma called each one
of us forward and blessed us wrapping us with her protection, for this was our last night
at the camp.
Day 4 🌙
On the final morning, for the last time, our group of students that collectively looked
almost identical to Gurukul students from centuries ago, rushed to their Gurudevi’s
class with paper and bag in hand. We spoke away with Nila Amma, and she taught us of
novel topics such as the shades of karma. Thereafter, we crossed our legs, closed our
eyes, and sat in meditation. The meditation today would be focused on awakening
through breathwork and awakening each of the thirty-three vertebras of the spinal cord.
Before we could realize, we had spent more than an hour and half meditating, and we
slowly returned to regular state. Thus, we expressed our gratitude and love for all the
beautiful energies that blessed us throughout this retreat and our Divine Guru who
created this opportunity for us. During each meditation she had blessed us with
marigold flower petals, and so she now revealed that they were charged with the powers
generated by us during our meditations and that we could oOer them to any loved one
that needed healing. We all then gathered and took pictures of our group that had
travelled and grown drastically together. After saying our goodbyes, to our dear Nila
Amma, to the land that welcomed us, and each other, we set oO to return home, this
time a little wiser.
Conclusion 🌙
During this four-day camp, we had many experiences, with each being so unique and
impactful that it felt like we had undertaken at least a month’s amount of self-work. By
the end, we had created deep understandings and kindred friendships: with the
gracious land of Nepal, with the powerful five elements, with ever-loving Nila Amma and
all companions on this journey. We had arrived here with the aim of healing and
dwelling deeper to find oneself, and now we had returned full of love and blessings, with
a vibrant energy and a self ever ready to surrender to the Divine Grace.
